People used to look up to me. They would depend on me for help, or ask for advice. People could count on me. I was some what respected as a mother who had it together. I don't think that's true anymore. Over the past four years something has happened to me. I'm not sure what it was. I have added two children to the family, started school, trained for a marathon and a few other races, and have pretty much lost my mind. I am not the mother I want to be. I am not the mother I used to be. I do not have it together. I cannot remember important things. I cannot remember non-important things. I am super stressed out because of my lack of remembering, especially in my Accounting class, which I am not doing well in at all. My Family Foundations class has been hard for me to swallow this past week. It is showing me all the ways I am not doing what I should be doing. It is reminding me how I used to be, and showing me the awful truth of who I have become. I am not the super mom I used to be. I am not enjoying my kids to the extent that I used to. I don't have time to. I am not prioritizing properly, and I am not budgeting my time well. My house is a disaster. My kids don't like me. I don't know what to do. I don't want to quit school, but I may need to take a break. I want to be the mom I used to be. I want to be the mom my kids will like. I want to show my kids that they are more important than school.
I have been doing a little research and I think I may have some mineral deficiencies. I have ordered some cod-liver oil to take and also I need to take my other vitamins and eat more healthy foods. Since I have not been running, I have not been using healthy foods to fuel my body. I have been stress eating and have gained 22 lbs. It stinks and I hate it. I follow the menu plan but I eat junk in between. No good.
I love this quote from President Monson. I know it is true. I just have to remember it is true.
" We know where we came from, why we are here, and where we will go when we leave this life. We know that we are children of our Heavenly Father and that He loves us. We know we want to return to Him after we leave this earthly existence. We know that what we do—and don’t do—here in mortality is of utmost importance. We also know that, should we fall short, our Savior has provided us with the precious gift of the Atonement and that, if we change our lives and our hearts and take advantage of the power of the Atonement, our sins and shortcomings will be forgiven and forgotten."
President Thomas S. Monson
"Be a Light to the World"
November 1, 2011 BYU Devotional
Now that I have that off my chest, I want to share that Amy Katherine Winn was baptized a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints on November 22, 2014 by her father Steve Winn. It was a nice program. Michael gave the talk on baptism and Sister Trusler gave the talk on the Holy Ghost. Mike Haynie played the piano for us and Suzette lead the music. Tommy and Alexis gave the opening and closing prayers. Amy looked beautiful. She is the sunshine in our home. I love her so much and am so happy that she is part of our eternal family.
